Award is really a credit to the men who give it

Today, I'm putting aside my disdain for tooting my own horn totalk about an honor I'm receiving.

There's a reason for that, which will become clear if you hear meout. On Friday, I will be among several people honored at the OneHundred Black Men of Chicago's 2000 Awards Benefit Gala: Investing inToday's Youth.

Others include: Alvenia Rhea Albright, American Express Co.,Patricia S. Harris, McDonald's Corp., Dr. Patricia Pickles, NorthChicago Public School system, Stanley Rakestraw, SCR MedicalTransportation Service and Steven White of AT&T Broadband & InternetServices. A special tribute will be given to Rep. Jesse Jackson Jr.(D-Ill.).

I'm overwhelmed because this recognition comes from black men.

It took a lot of guts for them to do that.

After all, in some circles a woman who speaks her mind aboutabsentee fathers is considered a male-basher. My e-mails runneth overwith men outraged that I would dare suggest African-American men havean obligation to marry their baby's mama. When I warned women not toleave their kids with their boyfriends, some men thought I wasstereotyping them as abusers. And my advice that women demand theirlovers put on a condom to stop the spread of HIV; AIDS sent some menover the edge.

It would have been easy for this prominent group of black men toavoid dealing with any controversy honoring me may have caused byleaving me out of the mix.

But these are men with a purpose.

I've watched my husband get up on weekends_the only time we reallyspend together_to rush off to a meeting of the 100 Black Men as if hewere getting paid by the hour. Most of us talk about what needs to bedone to help more black youth obtain higher education, but thesebrothers sponsor a daylong session in which high school students canpractice taking the ACT test.

I've watched these men, many of whom are successful businessowners or are at the top of their professions, give up their preciousfree time to mentor someone else's son or daughter.

I've watched them carry themselves in such a way that withoutusing words, they showed young brothers how to act in a way thatreminds us all that, yes, there are many well-spoken, courteous,young black males who are about the business of building a future.

It is a work of the heart that makes a black woman's mouth water.

So when I was notified that I would receive the group'shumanitarian award for my work on behalf of young people, I wasoverjoyed.

But a funny thing happened.

There was one little problem they didn't consider.

The event was being sponsored by the Chicago Tribune's charitablefoundation, and I, after all, write for the Chicago Sun-Times.

In an ideal world, that wouldn't matter. But let's be real. Thenewspapers are competitors, and it is a bit sticky to have acompetitor's columnist basking in the spotlight at an event primarilyfunded by the other paper.

For a moment, it looked like the brothers might renege on thehonor.

And I really couldn't have blamed them.

African-American organizations have not yet reached the pointwhere they are not dependent on funding from outside of thecommunity. Even though there's a lot of black wealth in this city,there is also a great need. In order to award scholarships, conductliteracy and mentoring programs, or take kids out of the neighborhoodfor cultural excursions, these not-for-profit groups have to holdfund-raisers.

Even then, the effort often falls short.

The situation isn't anything to be proud of, but it's reality.There is good news though. Because more African Americans have movedup the corporate ladder, more of them are in a position to access thesame level of funding that is doled out by the charitable foundationsof major corporations to other communities.

Still, as long as there are not enough black professionals andbusiness owners who are willing to support cultural institutions, thearts, and humanitarian efforts, groups that are working to save blackyouth are still dependent upon corporate donors or government grants.

Just as they took a risk by honoring me in the first place, theytook the risk that the Chicago Tribune Foundation would not balk. I'mglad the foundation found the work the 100 Black Men have done toimprove the educational opportunities for young black males worthsupporting no matter who was being honored.

Real men know what it takes to get the job done.

Thank you, 100 Black Men of Chicago Inc., for being real men.

E-mail: marym@suntimes.com